Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; Psalms 37:3-7a
lately i have been on a journey toward the heart of God. the last year has brought so much growth that I am struggling to remember who I was before. i do not to constantly come back to the fact that i am a :cancer conqueror: (not my phrase…) i know this was a huge moment for me. i was given a choice to love God or to hate God…I choose love. i was given the opportunity to take control and fight with all the strength that i had or to trust that God brought me here and that he was going to take care of me. not that fighting is not trusting, but fighting was a control thing for me. if i chose to research and know what was happening and what was coming my way i was no longer trusting God.
when i gave everything to God in the hospital room, little did i know where God would take me. i began to see the true heart of God. i began to understand that i had been :playing a part: for so many years. instead of God inviting me into a life that is beautiful and wonderful and better then I could expect, I was inviting God into my life….but only the parts i wanted him to see. (again with the control)
this morning at a prayer service at church, God was reminding me that he is faithful. and when we are seeking Him with all that we have, he will not only make himself known to us, but he will also begin to give us the things that we ask for. this has always been a hard concept for me…..as simple as it sounds, it is something that I have struggled with for years. let me try to explain….
For years I looked at this passage and thought I am gonna get everything that I want if I trust God. clearly this is a wrong way of thinking…….God is not a convenience store. we cannot approach the counter and just ask for whatever we want without first sitting in His presence. God is a gracious and loving God. he wants to give his children great and wonderful things. He wants to bless us.
but we have to seek his face.
so what does it mean….seek his face?
Simply put….shut up!!
Not trying to be rude or disrespectful….but there something that we need to understand….God wants to see us.
He wants to hang out in a coffee shoppe and having a meaningful conversation
He wants to go on a weekend hike into the wilderness and explore all that HE created
He wants to dance in the rain with us and let us experience freedom for the first time
He wants to sit on a big comfy couch on a crisp fall evening with a cup of hot coca and just be there…..
That is God
That is his heart.
It is simply.
It is real
And in those moments where we stop and breathe, HE will show up!!!
He will take a broken heart, a joyous spirit, a big dream, a little strength, whatever you bring, and make it a thousand times better
Why?
Because he can!!!!
His Word says that he will….
Trust……and he will bring forth your righteousness!!!
a humbled heart 